I’m going to admit it to you now, I struggle with body positivity. I always have done in some extent. As a teenager I was thin and hadn’t understood that you were meant to shave under your armpits. I remember being teased about that. What can I say, I wasn’t a fashionable teenager and I think possibly I’ve carried the name calling with me all these years.
The “In Between Sizes” Problem
Anyway, I didn’t intend on bringing up old incidents. Instead I wanted to share how I feel nowadays. On Saturday the 8th April I found myself in Nottingham without much to do. I needed a new coat so went to Outfit. The first thing I noticed whilst there is that I couldn’t find much size 14 clothes. I’m currently between size 14 and 16 but I couldn’t find much of either size to be honest. I never considered size 14 and 16 to be plus sizes but maybe they are now?
After having a look around Outfit and deciding against buying the new coat. It was a size 14 and it was snug so I gave it a miss. Next stop was Next (see what I did there). I looked at the professional wear range and decided to try on a trouser suit. It was a lovely style. It did fit me but I just felt frumpy. The stretch marks on my belly didn’t bother me but the flabbiness of my belly bothered me.
All the clothes stayed in Next – what was the point in me spending a fortune on clothes I’m either not going to wear or feel uncomfortable in? I feel like I’m letting down all the body positivity coaches if I say that I’m not happy with my own skin at the moment. Feeling like a frump and losing your hair will do that to a girl.
I Like Food!
A change is needed to get out of this rut. The rollerblading is partly to do with this – try and get me a bit more active. Trouble is I enjoy food and starving me won’t work out well for anyone. I’ll be hangry!! And that won’t be any good for anyone! Also, there’ll be an abundance of chocolate in this house this weekend. Seriously, how many Easter eggs do these girls need?
So what is the answer? Do I accept my body as it is or do I change?