Seems an odd topic and very morbid for this time of year but it’s this time of year that Taid died. This year I don’t think I’ve given Taid any graveside flowers. Initially I was feeling ashamed as I felt as though I had forgotten about him. But I haven’t.
Thinking of Taid
There isn’t a day that goes by that he doesn’t creep into my thoughts. If I see a beautiful sunrise, I think it’s him smiling down on me. If I see yellow roses then I’m thinking of him because he had a beautiful yellow rose bush by the front door. That very same rose bush is now by my front door – lovingly planted in an old toilet cistern. That’s a Taid thing as well. So everytime I walk in through my front door I now think of Taid. Cannot pass that rose bush without thinking of him. Even more so now that his daffodils have sprouted. Anyway I digress…
This always make me think about the concept of graveside flowers. Why do people do it? For the last 6 years I’ve tried to take graveside flowers to Taid but in all honesty, why? He’s not there. Taid’s gone. He isn’t there. He’s in a far better place and is looking after me every step of the way. I feel that the only purpose graveside flowers serve is to show other people that I’ve been there. I don’t need other people to know I’m thinking of Taid.
That doesn’t mean that this is something I disagree with though. For some people it brings them comfort – and I’m all for that. Do whatever that brings you comfort. My Nain prays every evening as it brings her comfort. But for me, taking some graveside flowers just doesn’t bring me any comfort. I just feel awkward.
Ah I know this is such a random topic but it’s something that’s been on my mind recently.